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Bryan & Vinny review TNA iMPACT! March 2014

This month: 10% does not mean things get run your way. MVP's final team member is Willow. Team MVP look like geeks. Shaw will take on Mr. Anderson at Lockdown. MVP helps Davey Richards by chewing out Aries. Mike Tenay has given up. EC3 has a devastating leg lock. Velvet Sky is selected to make the comeback. TNA needs more man on woman violence. Welcome back Russo. Sabin could not care less. Mr. Anderson in a red wig. Gunner and Storm talk. If your music hits you can't be counted out. MVP sacrifices a man to try to get a man advantage. Ric Flair was not a coward while Magnus has no self confidence. Joe and Magnus also talk. It was not cheap to fly Muta and his friends to Lockdown. Thousands of empty green chairs. Dixie is lousy. We have to listen to Craig's incredibly annoying, breathy voice again. Sam Shaw is a serial killer who wrestles as a hobby. Bryan has fully turned a corner on Mr. Anderson. It is idiotic to pretend he did not win his cage match. Lashley is back and confronts EC3. Two guys no one has ever seen before. Storm and Gunner is the best match on the show. Madison Rayne has thunder thighs. Abyss has lost his mask and gone corporate like his hero Kane. He fucks Joe out of the title match. Vinny loses his cool over the Lockdown match. Willow the Wisp shows up. Bully Ray was in MVP's pocket the whole time. Team MVP wins Lockdown. TNA's message is "we suck." Samoa Joe did get with with nails and was not out for the week. Angelina Love is back. The threat of using a weapon is okay; it's the execution that is a disqualification. Gail and Lei'd Tapa break up. Velvet stares at her own ass. Willow in the rafters. EC3 is great. Mr. Anderson gets his win back against Shaw. The Beautiful People reunite in the ring. Willow has a goofy dance and an umbrella. Bully beats up everyone and calls out Roode. Bully wants to meet with Dixie - why? Abyss and Eric Young brawl. Lashley loses his first match by DQ. 5 talking segments in a row. Gunner waits for Storm to finish and is then beaten soundly. Lei'd Tapa has no other options in TNA outside of Gail. What the fuck was the point of Joe Park? Bryan already hates Willow. Russo is surely ribbing Velvet. You can do anything on iMPACT! except interupt Magnus. The BroMans win clean. Madison is jumped like an idiot. MVP will be chained to Abyss. A Knux reality show about carnies. Bully Ray is a maroon and gets laid out. MVP's plan fails; he is an idiot and a worse boss than Dixie. They have not had a clean TNA Championship match in 432 days. MVP is an impotent fool, Samoa Joe an idiot and Magnus a pussy. Abyss gets over. MVP punishes Abyss with a championship match. Eric Young also gets added to the match. EC3 and Spud hunt Willow. Eddie Edwards makes Magnus tap out. The Beautiful People tease a breakup. Bully Ray is a fan favorite. Magnus and Abyss tease a breakup. Horrifying Knux video - to be continued. Madison and Angelina set wrestling back 50 years. Why humiliate your son in front of the world? Sam Shaw cuts Christy's hair. He gets suspended for a week. Gunner beats Storm with the Hanger 18. Next week, a 4 way tables match that makes no sense.