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7 Deeply Upsetting Lessons I Learned From Being the other woman Fabienne Slama Your Tango

I am so excited to bring you this incredible interview with Relationship & Business Coach Fabienne Slama. Fabienne is willing to step aside from the natural judgment that comes from society on infidelity and share her personal experience of her 9-month journey of being the “other woman/mistress in order to help women who may feel stuck in shame or guilt for their own affair experience or simply going through a journey that goes against one's values and rules for life. Fabienne Slama has both been cheated on and been the mistress so her view on infidelity comes from many angles which is invaluable. 00:00 Intro 6:39 My ex-husband cheated on me a few times. I used to blame and judge the other woman thinking she was awful but then I became the other woman. 7:40 After I said no, no, no we ended up having an affair relationship. We separated, he then said he would leave his wife, he moved in and then he went back to his wife 8:41 How did I get myself in this affair, me of all people, infidelity goes against every one of my values 8:43 Sometimes, you go against your values. 9:23 No one will ever be as mean to me as I was to myself. 12:16 The journey of the affair relationship: One day it was amazing then painful 12:15 Being the mistress is not as glamorous as it sounds. 12:59 When we were together it was fantastic but at the end of the day he would go back home to his wife and kids 13:18 Obsession. I was waiting in front of my phone and constantly checking the messages 13:35 We would travel together but the pain of coming back home by myself and him going back to his wife was terrible 13:50 Uncertainty hurts more than heartbreak. 14:18 Why do I accept crumbs for myself, im a strong woman. Constant highs and extreme lows 14:30 Guilty pleasure makes the relationship even more passionate. 14:52 An affair is like a drug addiction. The mystery 15:20 Infidelity is fake love, the mystery creates an illusion of passion 15:50 As the other woman you don’t have to wash his dirty socks. You get all the glamour 17:53 Attracting healthy love instead of being the other woman, other man. I feel honoured, adored and we create passion by creating adventure. 19:56 I was the wife being cheated on for 20 years and I judged the other woman / mistress / other man. 20:26 I could meet him in hotel rooms, sneak around, in secret. 21:58 Daughter of the mistress. The stress of the other woman. People found out about the long term affair of 60 years when the wife died. 23:00 Being the mistress / other woman I had constant fear of being caught. 23:30 I wouldn't text him during the day because I wouldn't want him to get caught or his wife to find out. I was constantly judging myself. 23:57 Guilt and shame can make you sick. 24:01 Uncertainty hurts more than heartbreak. Guilt and shame can make you sick. 26:59 Book recommendations if you are the other woman, other man, mistress 27:05 Louise Hay you can heal your life. 38:41 Forgiveness after being the other woman in an affair 29:07 Does being the other woman feel good? Do you feel like you are honouring yourself? Are you living up to your values? 29:43 You have to learn to let go and forgive. 29:15 Can you talk to your friends and your mum about this affair relationship about dating a married man in secret? 29:38 Do you see yourself with your affair partner if the relationship stays the same way? 40:04 What to do if you are stuck in a long term affair? 40:22 I can’t do the pain anymore. Tried to end it but keep going back to the affair / married man. 48:02 You deserve better than a married man not committing fully to you. Your Tango Blog - Written by Fabienne: 7 Deeply Upsetting Lessons I Learned From Being 'The Other Woman' https://www.yourtango.com/experts/fab... To connect with Fabienne Slama: https://www.fabyoulicious.com/ You Can Heal Your Life by Louise L. Hay: https://www.amazon.com.au/You-Can-Hea... The Encyclopedia of Ailments and Diseases: How to Heal the Conflicted Feelings, Emotions, and Thoughts at the Root of Illness By Jacques Martel: https://www.amazon.com.au/Encyclopedi... To book a free call with me: https://calendly.com/katelondon/call Website: http://katelondon.com.au Instagram:   / katelondon01   Join our PRIVATE Support Community: http://katelondon.com.au